01 jun 2004 tue - 18:02

yay...once again my only day off is spent doing responsible shit like getting a job and babysitting. i HATE writing cover letters. i have no fuckin clue what to say, and i have to change the letter for every damn job. i think i am going to say fuck americorps. financially i really just dont want to swing it. and i think i can get SOMETHInG. TheOrg has crappy hours - like 1 to 9 pm. but maybe it wouldnt bug me so much if i was organizing during crappy hours instead of cashiering during crappy hours. damn, i just cant wait to get all this crap settled. we go up to mpls on the 6th & start hardcore apartment hunting. then i have a observation day from 1 to 9pm on the 8th which is good coz i can really see what happens and bad coz i eats up a whole day practically for apartment hunting. so i gave my lighter to carrie last night after we went out for a bottle of wine and said she should take it coz im quitting smoking. quitting sucks. im impatient and snacky and such. but i do feel like i want to take more control over my life and smoking is the biggest thing i need to change right now. like ponge just wants me to be happy but doesnt want to deal with me going through withdrawal since i told him id be bitchy and such. but then he said hes never seen me be bitchy (!) so i dont think it will be as bad as i thought it would be from his perspective since from mine ive definitly been bitchy to him and around him. so i dont know really what he imagines is going to happen. any way.. non smoking is the most important ingestion change to make for now. then i want to work on the way i eat - like more fresh foods, more variety in meals, less meat & grease, etc.

but what im really doing now is procrastinating because i have all these fuckin jobs to apply for. dammit.

(previous) :::: (next)

26 oct 2005 wed - my dead diary.

14 jun 2004 mon - drug use et al.

11 jun 2004 fri - stuff to take care of

01 jun 2004 tue - quit again again again

30 may 2004 sun - u n l o a d